I was challenged to look at the people who were taking energy from my life, to the point of exhaustion and considering letting them go. The term that was used was “energy vampire”. To my understanding, this term is a widely used term to describe a person that takes up so much space and time in your life, it becomes unhealthy for you.
I feel, personally, that the decision is entirely up to you, and you shouldn’t be shamed either way if you decide to keep them in your life or not. Personally, there are people in my life who need more of my energy, and they can’t help it because they have a medical diagnosis that requires extra care, or they are so young that they need extra energy from me to help them grow into beautiful human beings or psychologically they need more therapeutic communication. Whatever it is, I am reminded of their humanity, and, yes, sometimes it is exhausting, but it isn’t a crime to need more love and it isn’t a crime to try to challenge yourself to reach deeper levels of my own love, and kindness and patience and provide it to people who need it. They aren’t monsters for needing your energy, and I’m not a crazy person for wanting to freely give it to these people. They are mothers, brothers, sisters, fathers, we are all family. It’s not easy. It’s labor and it might exhaust the reserves. But it’s a labor of love. On that note, yes, if I am not able to handle it, I should absolutely make every effort to make sure they receive the correct care from the correct people and if I do everything I can, and I’ve reached the very bottom- safely, and kindly, disengage. However, in my self reflection, I would ask myself how much of that was self-care and how much of it was ego-preservation/narcicism.
The term energy vampire is unkind, and dated. There are better ways to describe “energy vampires”. When terminology no longer ceases to be useful, then the terminology should evolve into language that is concise, descriptive, but also kind. Words matter. It’s why people are outraged by terminology like “shithole countries”, because, yes, it’s descriptive, but it isn’t kind.
I will say that being challenged in this way has sparked a fire in me to change my general attitude towards people. I recognize now that there are people who do not want your energy, who can’t handle your truth without feeling ashamed, or defensive. And for those people, safely, and kindly, disengage.